A Session With My Self(ie)

7:27 AM

I often hear that it's hard for photographers to be on the other side of the lens.  Could it be the extra tinkering that goes into setting up the scene, timing the shutter...and the all around back and forth one must do when they shoot themselves?  Or could it possibly have to do with the very same reason why clients get so uneasy on the hot seat; which is-without good direction-one doesn't know how to play to the camera.  Unless you're a professional model, it's not so easy to strut your stuff while staring at an inanimate piece of equipment. There has to be an understanding of what you're real purpose is before striking a pose. It's just as important as picking out an outfit for your shoot. Deciding what the intention of the shoot beforehand definitely helps keep things in perspective. For instance, boudoir clients know exactly why they schedule such a session: they want to get their sexy on. For portraits however, it's not that simple.  Is it for beauty, which usually focuses on makeup, skin, jewelry, etc., or maybe a more artistic approach, which focuses on eyes, mood, emotion of the moment...

The other day, I installed some adorable and surprisingly dainty LED light strips around my vanity mirror.  WHOA! I totally had a "...look at the pretty lights" moment.  Can I just tell you how delicious these lights are, forming dazzling catchlights in the eyes that I hear about all the time from every photographer ever.  Yes, I mostly shoot in natural light, which makes for a greatly lit scene all around.  But these catchlights have me buzzing for some Alien Bees (studio strobes)!  I digress...

They inspired me so immediately that I decided right then to do what I've been dreading for weeks...Self Portraits.  Why is it so hard for photographers to be the subject?  How can we be so confident when directing and shooting our clients and purport to instill confidence when we literally drag our own butts to strike a pose?  It sort of compares to a singer who hates the sound of their own voice, or actors who refuse to watch themselves onscreen; are we so critical of ourselves?  Is it a woman thing?  I was awakened to a couple of things while timing and posing that I would like to share:
  1. I can now sympathize with my clients awkwardness when trying to pose from mere verbal direction.  Posing is no easy feat!
  2. Using artificial lights is going to be an amazingly fun challenge
  3. and most important of all......embracing and NOT turning away from seeing my self, the beauty in my flaws
Emotionally speaking, it was great seeing my frames in post.  I got excited which is the exact opposite of what I was expecting.  I giggled at newfound wrinkles by my eyes, the funny faces I made, and most of all-those certain little things I was always so critical about was quickly brushed off.  I saw myself in a whole new light (HA!) I gained a new respect for my not-so-young self, along with appreciation of my individuality.  There is only one me.  That is what I want to share and bring out in my clients; to be content in their own skin and to embrace their individual beauty.  Maybe, just maybe fall in love with themselves in an era where self-deprecation is as common as the morning coffee.  We are ALL BEAUTIFUL in our most organic way.  This session taught me that!  

Technically speaking, it was fun posing in front of these gorgeous lights.  I focused not on my reflection but on the catchlights.  Limited to a small space behind my vanity, the set up of tripod was a task but where there is a will....Let me tell you, what a flirt!  Once I got comfortable, (hmmm, about 30 frames in) I found myself  twisting, turning, tilting and smizing all the way to 100-sumodd images. Maaaan, those lights sure turned ME on.  

Here are some of those shots from my shoot.  Happy Viewing! ;-)








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