The Opposite of Self-Critique; Self Portrait Series
12:15 PM
Why is it so hard for us to take compliments? When people compliment us, why do we immediately ask "Ok, what do want, how much do you need?" Even men shrug off and shy away when someone notices how great their smile is or when they have a nice haircut. We all do that same little "aww shucks" shuffle, look down coyly and laugh it off, don't we? We immediately start to judge the other person; try to decide if they're being genuine, if there is a motive, are they just being polite...thus the battle of self-deprecation continues. We can sometimes say "Thank you" and mean it, well, because our mommas taught us so. Yet, the older I get, the more accepting I try to be. Not only of the compliments, but of my own appearance. Make no mistake, this goes beyond the superficial level. We beat ourselves up when reviewing images of ourselves and I have taken notice. Specifically when I speak with my own daughters, whom I think are the most beautiful aesthetically and all around. It pulls at my heartstrings to hear my girls talk about specifics; their shoulders, their teeth, their smile....things they feel are accentuated in an image. Right away, I want to shoot them (with my camera of course) and show them what I see. Responsibly, it starts with me.
Like most people, I kind of cringe when I think about posing for self portraits. Even taking selfies can be quite nerve racking at times. Usually, the review is followed by a battery of self critique and the delete button trigger finger gets happy. How easy it is to look at an image of myself and start with the rants about my hair, my nose, my wrinkles, my skin, my twitchy eye...and then, it happened!
I began to cull a recent self portrait shoot. As I scroll past each image, I notice that I am really close to the camera and without even thinking I decided "Nope, these won't work"--trigger finger hovering over the delete, and then....pause...."Hmmmmm, this ones ok" and it continued. I actually liked them but more importantly, I accepted them, which is to say, I accepted myself! The opposite of self-critique began.
"I really like my hair here", and "Oh, my eyes really do look nice in this light"
It was very own reveal! Lol. Just like at a viewing session, when my clients sit with me and see their images for the very first time and ghasp-in love with what they see-themselves, which I live for. They can finally see what I see. Now, I did, too. Moving forward, I want to create a new habit; cringe less when viewing images of myself (its an exercise like any other and will take work, lol) find things I like and talk "UP" about it, say thank you and mean it when someone pays me a compliment!
As usual, life always has a funny way of bringing things round full circle. As I was drafting this post, I came across a beautiful poem and I wanted to share it here with you all along with some images from my shoot! Please check her stuff out, she is creatively beautiful!
"Honey, what I'm trying to say is this:
Fall in love with yourself.
(No, I mean it.)
Take yourself on dates and make yourself dinner.
Surprise yourself with chocolates and flowers and treats
and compliment yourself in the mirror. You look gorgeous.
Make yourself tea in the mornings, or at the end of a long day,
and take long walks with yourself,
stopping to pet dogs or to admire the view.
Fall in love with yourself.
Fall in love with the way you laugh,
and the way your hands look gripping the steering wheel of your car,
and the way you stutter when you're talking to someone you like,
and that one piece of hair that always curls away from the rest.
You are a delight.
You are a wonder.
You are gold.
Fall in love with yourself.
You're worth it."
•••
written by @shecraftswords
 |
| MUA; Karina Ji Hair: Kysti |
I began to cull a recent self portrait shoot. As I scroll past each image, I notice that I am really close to the camera and without even thinking I decided "Nope, these won't work"--trigger finger hovering over the delete, and then....pause...."Hmmmmm, this ones ok" and it continued. I actually liked them but more importantly, I accepted them, which is to say, I accepted myself! The opposite of self-critique began.
"I really like my hair here", and "Oh, my eyes really do look nice in this light"
It was very own reveal! Lol. Just like at a viewing session, when my clients sit with me and see their images for the very first time and ghasp-in love with what they see-themselves, which I live for. They can finally see what I see. Now, I did, too. Moving forward, I want to create a new habit; cringe less when viewing images of myself (its an exercise like any other and will take work, lol) find things I like and talk "UP" about it, say thank you and mean it when someone pays me a compliment!
As usual, life always has a funny way of bringing things round full circle. As I was drafting this post, I came across a beautiful poem and I wanted to share it here with you all along with some images from my shoot! Please check her stuff out, she is creatively beautiful!
"Honey, what I'm trying to say is this:
Fall in love with yourself.
(No, I mean it.)
Take yourself on dates and make yourself dinner.
Surprise yourself with chocolates and flowers and treats
and compliment yourself in the mirror. You look gorgeous.
Make yourself tea in the mornings, or at the end of a long day,
and take long walks with yourself,
stopping to pet dogs or to admire the view.
Fall in love with yourself.
Fall in love with the way you laugh,
and the way your hands look gripping the steering wheel of your car,
and the way you stutter when you're talking to someone you like,
and that one piece of hair that always curls away from the rest.
You are a delight.
You are a wonder.
You are gold.
Fall in love with yourself.
You're worth it."
•••
written by @shecraftswords
 |
| MUA: Karina Ji, Hair: Krysti |
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